brushoff | tlv ic contact

Does it make you feel better? Your own esteem and whatnot. [Because he assumes that it would. It's why Jopson always took such care with his captain's appearance.]

It does, [ he admits, with a little shrug. ] I like looking good. I like the feeling of confidence I get when I know I'm attractive enough to have everybody stare at me. I like being the center of attention. And getting dressed up and dolled up certainly helps with that.

[He’s quiet for a long moment, staring down at his own hands and then at Dorian’s.]

Does being adored for your beauty make you happy?

Being adored in general makes me happy, [ he admits. Having finished with one hand, Dorian takes the other. ]

I have a very good handle on all of my flaws. I'm selfish and needy. I drive away the people I love or they end up out of my life due to reasons beyond my control. I've spent far too much time alone and know that when I return home, I'll be alone again. So I take any grasp of attention I can get my hands on. It won't be much in the grand scheme of things, but it can pass the time.

[He frowns softly.] That’s horribly sad. You must be surpassingly lonely.

[Like me, he thinks.]

I’d often wondered how my life would have differed had I been beautiful. Would have it been any easier for me? Would Ross have rejected me then, Sophia? It doesn’t do to dwell on the things I cannot change, but still…

[ He is lonely. Desperately so. But he's keeping that to himself. ]

If you were more conventionally beautiful, you'd have a different set of problems. There's no easy way to live a problem-free life.

I do wonder if I might like to have those problems. Might be a breath of fresh air.

[But it is what it is.]

For the moment. But then I suspect you'd get tired of it.

[ Dorian adjusts his position so that he can set the bottle of clear nail polish on a nearby side table. He uncaps the top before taking Crozier's hand in his. ]

A layer of clear first. That'll help the polish stay on longer. Then a few layers of blue, then a layer of clear to prevent chipping.

[He nods for him to go on.]

Grass is always greener and whatnot.

Precisely. What matters is making the best of your situation.

[ Gently, Dorian takes Crozier's hand. He lightly starts to paint his nails clear, smiling slightly as he does so. ]

There are ways that someone can change their situation, of course. But speaking from experience? Sometimes it's best going with the devil you know.

Well, it isn't as though I can change those parts of myself now.

That depends entirely on what parts of yourself you don't like, [ he says, like it's the most obvious thing in the world. ]

If you want to be cute, start dressing like you're cute. The afterlife can't mess that one up.

Nails first. Then maybe the outfit.

[He can’t change the personality. Too bad.]

[ Dorian almost makes a joke about going full Queer Eye on Crozier but stops once he realizes there's no way in hell Francis would get that reference.

That being said, he is becoming more and more aware that he's going full Queer Eye on Crozier. Whatever. If he can't pull himself out of his spiral of self-loathing, the least he can do is help Crozier out of his. ]

Even if you don't want to change the outfit, I'll still find a way to sneak a few pieces into your closet. You'd look good in a suit.

[He always did like the way he looked in full dress uniform.]

One of those more modern ones, I’d imagine.

[He looks down at his nails with an appreciative hum. He likes the way this feels.]

[ Having finished the clear polish on one hand, Dorian lightly takes Crozier's other hand and starts to paint those nails with clear as well. ]

I'd have you pick something out for me, [ he grins. ] I'll have something vintage, you'll have something fashion-forward.

You’d look fetching in high-cut trousers and a navy waistcoat. All that gold.

[He grins, just a touch suggestively.]

Find those clothes for me and I'll happily give them a try.

[ Dorian's grin is just as suggestive and just as cheeky as he dips the brush back into the nail polish: needs more clear. ]

You could have mine, but I’d need to find a tailor. [He chuckles to think of Dorian swimming in his waistcoat and trousers.]

Perhaps that giant wardrobe might have something — but I doubt anything on the Barge would be that helpful.

Who knows, it might. I managed to find a few clothes for my inmate after scrounging around there.

[ Dorian recaps the clear. He gently brings Crozier's hand closer to his face so that he can blow on the man's fingernails in an attempt to dry them a little faster than their current speed. ]

Though if you want to absolutely make sure, have your temp bother the Admiral.

Oh, I don't ask my temps for much.

[He makes a point of it, not willing to let himself be vulnerable for too long with someone not permanent.

When Dorian blows on his fingers his breath catches in his throat. Nope. Nope nope, ignoring this.]

You should, [ he says, without hesitation and absolutely without realizing how Crozier's breath catches in his throat. ] I don't know how much use as a whole temps can be, so why not wring them dry and ask them for petty little nonsense?

[ He reaches over to pick up the blue nail polish. Cap still on, Dorian shakes the bottle to disperse everything up a bit. ]

They'll like it. People like feeling needed.

Oh, but I couldn’t. That’s not me. [It’d taken him years to become comfortable with having a steward after all.]

I don’t do nonsense — barring this. This is my only exception.

Then I'll have to find a way to put more nonsense in your life, [ Dorian teases. With that, he uncaps the blue and carefully, deftly starts to paint Crozier's nails. ]

You look like a man who might need it.

[He laughs softly and ducks his head a little.] I may be, in fact, a man who needs it.

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