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[brushoff]

"You've reached the inbox of one Dorian Gray. Don't forget to leave me a message. If you're interesting, I'll get back to you."

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[citizendetective]

[Misty watches him, not saying anything for a long moment.]

You really love it, don't you.

["Love" may very well be the wrong word, but it's how Misty - twisted, screw-loose Misty - interprets it.]

[brushoff]

It's a part of me. [ He idly rests his fingers on the canvas. ] And I love myself. Literature's most famous narcissist, after all.

[ He says that dryly, as if he's trying to convince himself or he's privy to a terrible joke. ]

So yes, I suppose I do love it.

[citizendetective]

Are you bitter about that?

[Honing in!]

The book, people recognizing you, feeling like you're being told who to be...

[brushoff]

God no, [ he says, with a shake of his head. ] Have you read it? It's a work of art.

[citizendetective]

No, I missed that one in high school. It just seems unlike you to let a book define you.

[brushoff]

The author was a close friend, [ he shrugs. ] And someone treated unfairly in life. He deserves a legacy.

[citizendetective]

There's a book about me at home.

[She says it offhandedly, seemingly addressing the painting rather than Dorian himself.]

Well! Kind of. I'm in it, but it's all speculation, really.

[brushoff]

Is it about that plane crash?

[citizendetective]

Yeah.

[She smiles a little.]

It's hilarious.

[brushoff]

One man's hilarious is another man's fucking traumatic, [ he dryly responds. ]

But I'm curious. One, how long were you girls out there anyway? And two, how many details did they get wrong?

[citizendetective]

Oh, tons, hence the hilarity. I always love seeing what people get wrong.

[And that conspicuous lack of detail is just about all the detail that she'll give.]

We were out there for nineteen months.

[brushoff]

Just long enough to go full Donner Party, [ he dryly responds, absolutely unaware of just how right he is. ]

I imagine the press tour when you were rescued was horrendous.

[citizendetective]

[She nods solemnly.]

They wanted us to appear on TV. Morning talk shows, you know. Nobody did, obviously.

[brushoff]

Of course not, [ he says, like it's obvious. Dorian lets out a dark little chuckle before, ] Let's all recount our trauma solely to get those sweet, sweet views! Nothing can possibly go wrong. Have fun talking about our dead friends!

[citizendetective]

Feed the media machine, right?

[Misty says, smiling wryly.]

Apparently the book sold really well.

[brushoff]

And let me guess? You and Natalie never saw a cent.

[citizendetective]

It was "unauthorized", so... no. But we got settlement money from the plane company. I used mine to buy a house!

[brushoff]

Thank you American legal system, [ he dryly responds.

As they talk, Dorian's attention still remains on his portrait, as if he's entranced. He's barely paid Misty any attention. It is becoming very obvious that just going to his attic and hanging around his portrait is something Dorian does on a regular basis. ]

[citizendetective]

Yeah, I mean, I've never cared much about money anyway--

[Which is an easy thing for someone who grew up moderately wealthy to say.]

-- and it certainly didn't make up for much, but it's been nice to have. I used it to travel, too.

[A pause.]

Dorian?

[brushoff]

[ For the first time in the conversation, he notices that Misty's there. Dorian blinks slightly, as if waking up from a little nap, before turning to her and asking, ]

Yeah?

[citizendetective]

Are you okay?

[There's curiosity and interest behind her concern, but the concern is at least still there.]