[I wasn't planning on making it a habit. I just...
I was in the mood to experiment tonight. I appreciate you making the time for me.]
He's not getting into it, not by himself. Part of it is just the fact that he doesn't want to rant about how fucking difficult Arthur is and how much what he did hurt him and how angry he is at Arthur for acting as if he was being manipulative by just trying to do things in the least harmful way possible.
It's why he came to Dorian and not to Misty. He doesn't want to rant. But he doesn't want to be alone either. Or focus on how Arthur's voice had sounded as he'd closed the door.
"I'll always make time for you," Dorian points out. Especially now, when John's really in a bit of a mood. "You and Arthur were there for me after that Misty business with Pagan's coma. I'm going to be here for you with whatever this is."
No questions about whatever it is. No probing. Just someone who recognizes that it must have been bad and will happily be there for John and/or Arthur the way that they were for him.
"Anyway, first up! A shot of vodka. Sláinte!" And then Dorian expertly knocks back the shot before setting the shotglass back on the table with a thud.
[ The first part of what he says- well, he doesn't feel as if he did much of anything. All he'd done was spend time with him. But he doesn't particularly want to argue and he'd much rather focus on- ]
[ I don't feel anything. I assume it takes time? ]
"Yup," Dorian says, popping the 'p' of that word as he pours himself another shot. Better to speed along the process, after all.
"Nobody gets drunk instantly. You drink, you have some shots, you worry that you aren't drunk enough so you have a few more shots, then it hits you like a goddamn freight train."
"Absolutely not!" Dorian grins. Hey, let's have shot number three. He'll fix himself a mixed drink to sip on after this but if John wants to feel drunk, let's get absolutely drunk.
"If you're eighteen years old and going to a pub for the first time, you're absolutely going to end up puking behind the trash cans because you don't know your limits. Fortunately, it's at that point where you realize what your limits are. This next shot is whiskey, by the way."
Variety is the spice of life, after all. And time for shot number three!
"Points for John!" he laughs. "Different types of alcohol have different levels of alcohol content. After all, you can't drink straight alcohol. Spirits like vodka and whiskey have a higher alcohol content than wine or beer. Drink those straight if you want to get fucked up as quickly as possible."
"Everything will start to feel different. Drunkness depends on the person, but there will definitely be a feeling of unsteadiness—a fuzziness or lightness in the head, perhaps?" Don't mind Dorian as he starts to make himself a gin and tonic.
"Generally speaking, you'll feel your inhibitions lowered and you're more likely to think that doing something kind of dumb is a good idea."
"Absolutely! As far as I'm concerned, it's amazing."
Considering that he drunk like, three shots right in a row, the small, creeping feeling of euphoria and not giving a shit that comes with being drunk is starting to latch onto Dorian's brain—though as John's at the wheels, he's the one who starts to feel the effects.
Correction: it feels WEIRD and floaty and kind of like he's disassociating from himself. It feels like nothing matters and that... feels like Nothing Matters. Whoah.
[ ...is it supposed to make you... disconnect from everything? ]
"It all depends on the person," Dorian shrugs. "Different people get drunk in different ways. Some are fighty drunks, some are sad drunks, some are giggly drunks. You won't know what sort of drunk you are until you actually get drunk to begin with."
"You know, you saying that there are places our conversation shouldn't go makes me want to push it there to begin with," Dorian teases, grin on his face as he takes another sip of his drink.
Not even. More 'baby's first fight where they can be separate'.
[I did what we agreed to do. And I did it as carefully as I possibly could. And *then* I dropped it when it was clear he was upset. But he just kept being upset at me.]
He realizes that there's probably no context he can give that will truly explain things, but at the very least-
[There are things that I need Arthur's help to understand from a human perspective to help Natalie. Arthur told me I could always ask him for help that way. But when I did, he-
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I was in the mood to experiment tonight. I appreciate you making the time for me.]
He's not getting into it, not by himself. Part of it is just the fact that he doesn't want to rant about how fucking difficult Arthur is and how much what he did hurt him and how angry he is at Arthur for acting as if he was being manipulative by just trying to do things in the least harmful way possible.
It's why he came to Dorian and not to Misty. He doesn't want to rant. But he doesn't want to be alone either. Or focus on how Arthur's voice had sounded as he'd closed the door.
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No questions about whatever it is. No probing. Just someone who recognizes that it must have been bad and will happily be there for John and/or Arthur the way that they were for him.
"Anyway, first up! A shot of vodka. Sláinte!" And then Dorian expertly knocks back the shot before setting the shotglass back on the table with a thud.
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[ I don't feel anything. I assume it takes time? ]
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"Nobody gets drunk instantly. You drink, you have some shots, you worry that you aren't drunk enough so you have a few more shots, then it hits you like a goddamn freight train."
Time to knock back shot number two!
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Isn't alcohol a poison? He thinks he remembers something about that in their discussion about substance abuse.
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"If you're eighteen years old and going to a pub for the first time, you're absolutely going to end up puking behind the trash cans because you don't know your limits. Fortunately, it's at that point where you realize what your limits are. This next shot is whiskey, by the way."
Variety is the spice of life, after all. And time for shot number three!
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Between whiskey and whatever that was before.
[ I can't taste anything, so you know. ]
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What should I look for? ]
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"Generally speaking, you'll feel your inhibitions lowered and you're more likely to think that doing something kind of dumb is a good idea."
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Sorry, he's really not seeing the appeal here. He thought there was more to it.
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At least, Dorian hopes he will.
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And you do this for fun? ]
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Considering that he drunk like, three shots right in a row, the small, creeping feeling of euphoria and not giving a shit that comes with being drunk is starting to latch onto Dorian's brain—though as John's at the wheels, he's the one who starts to feel the effects.
And it feels great.
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[ ...is it supposed to make you... disconnect from everything? ]
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This is a concern. He's concerned about it.
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[Arthur's upset. And I don't think I did anything wrong. And I'm not sure if I'm doing something wrong now but I hate it.]
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... well, probably not technically. Baby's first fight after everything got a little codependent?
"Tell me what happened."
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[I did what we agreed to do. And I did it as carefully as I possibly could. And *then* I dropped it when it was clear he was upset. But he just kept being upset at me.]
He realizes that there's probably no context he can give that will truly explain things, but at the very least-
[There are things that I need Arthur's help to understand from a human perspective to help Natalie. Arthur told me I could always ask him for help that way. But when I did, he-
He got upset and told me to get out.]
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