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[brushoff]

"You've reached the inbox of one Dorian Gray. Don't forget to leave me a message. If you're interesting, I'll get back to you."

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Comments

[riseunparalleled]

Mm. Being willing to chance trusting people, who need someone to take the risk of faith; taking responsibility for your actions; freely offering advice...

It seems to be there are a lot of reasons you were chosen to do this job.

[brushoff]

Please stop complimenting me, [ grumbles the man who will happily talk himself up as a narcissist.

Yeah he'll say he's hot shit and he'll act like he's the most important person in the world, but it's different when someone says you're nice! ]

[riseunparalleled]

Is it a compliment if it's just saying what I've seen...? [Still, he's not without pity.]

Okay, you could chose to be nicer to people at times, but don't. Does that make it better? [He doesn't think there's anything wrong with the choice, but that still makes it neutral instead of complimentary.]

[brushoff]

Much, [ he sighs. ] I've got a reputation to uphold, after all.

[riseunparalleled]

A reputation for what?

[brushoff]

Being a poor influence. [ and being horny on main, but Dorian's pretty sure Xie Lian's pieced that part out already. ] Odd as it may be, I revel in it.

[riseunparalleled]

[Xie Lian grins at him.] Perhaps we were always destined for friendship, as I'm known as a very poor influence myself.

[brushoff]

True! But I think we're both poor influences in radically different ways.

[riseunparalleled]

Mm. [Xie Lian acknowledges this with a nod.] You probably get less complaints...

[brushoff]

Honestly, my biggest complaints are 'why are you like this' and 'stop doing that.'

[riseunparalleled]

One of the great philosophical questions, not bad. I just usually end up in situations where no one's happy.

[brushoff]

To be fair, most of my stories end in tragedy.

[riseunparalleled]

Mine are less tragedy and more people complaining. Ah, but tragedies often about where the story ends, so one of the inevitable parts of immortality.

[brushoff]

True. Everything dies—except us, of course.

[riseunparalleled]

[He nods.] Which can bring new ways to cut up the story into tragedy - or not. Death isn't so bad after a good life, or a person's achievements can outlast them. And then those achievements too can become long forgotten dust. Then it can become moments that matter, just the brief intersections with others lives...

[brushoff]

You say that death isn't so bad after a good life, but I'd beg to differ. I died once. And then I murdered three people so I could come back to life. And I doubt I'm the only one who would take that chance if it was given.

[riseunparalleled]

Ah, but that's from the view of the person who's died. [Perspective, as much as time, plays a part in what counts as a tragedy. Though, he also does have to ask,] ...Would you say that you had lived a good and full life, before dying...?

[brushoff]

I mean it was my life, [ he shrugs. ] It doesn't matter whether if it was good or full. It was just me.

[riseunparalleled]

It matters a little, if the question is whether or not someone would be satisfied with a good life...

[brushoff]

What matters was that I wanted to live. Satisfaction or whatever doesn't enter into the equation. I was a coward who didn't want to accept the choices I made, so I killed three people to get out of that situation.

[riseunparalleled]

[Satisfaction is literally the whole equation for whether or not someone might look back on their life and be okay with letting go. Something Xie Lian has a lot of experience with from a lengthy lifetime of dealing with ghosts. But this is about Dorian, not a wider picture.] The desire to hold onto life can make people do many things. Sometimes things they'd do otherwise, anyway, sometimes not.

[brushoff]

[ A pause before, ] I'd murder people anyway if that's what you're asking. I've done it before.

[ But not innocents, not like those poor kids who just were at the wrong place at the wrong time. Who were an opportunity that Dorian took. ]

[riseunparalleled]

[He sighs.] I've killed a lot of people.

Most of the time, I killed them on one battlefield or another. They weren't people who'd done anything 'wrong', and most of them likely weren't there by true choice. I could've let them 'kill' me, instead.

I don't think murder is right. Immortality means having to live with all the choices you've made. Since it also means everyone else has to live with you, regret is no bad thing.

[brushoff]

Oh, war's different than murder, [ Dorian points out, with a little frown. ] I've been in war as well. But...I suppose you're right about that much. You live with what you've done.

[riseunparalleled]

Mm. Though the difference can shrink, depending on how good you are at killing people. [He doesn't think the Judge was wrong to label the people he'd killed on the battlefield as murdered.] I don't think anyone gets through a normal lifespan without a few regrets, the more time you have, the more they pile up. Yet if I went back to the start, I'd still pick immortality.

...Of course, there are a number of bad choices that I'd still pick, even knowing the results. Which can make certain 'work relationships' a little awkward.