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[brushoff]

"You've reached the inbox of one Dorian Gray. Don't forget to leave me a message. If you're interesting, I'll get back to you."

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Comments

[brushoff]

[ If one more person tries to do something nice for him, he swears to God.... ]

Right, someone obviously hasn't gotten the 'surprise, I'm immortal' talk yet.

[citizendetective]

I-- I mean, you definitely said some things that very heavily implied-- also, we're all immortal here, kind of.

Whatever, that's not the point! We have a friend in common. Or a "friend", in your case, haha. We should hang out, get drinks...

[brushoff]

If I stab you in the chest, you'll bleed out. If you stab me in the chest, it will hurt, I'll start to bleed, but the moment you move the knife away, my wounds will start to heal and sooner or later, I'll be right as rain.

And considering that we both exist on a small boat with forty people on it, we probably have multiple friends in common. Case in point, I get your warden drunk on a fairly regular basis.

[citizendetective]

Exactly, he's who I was talking about!

[brushoff]

[ There's a pause as Dorian seriously considers just telling Misty to 'fuck off'...but Pagan's a friend. And if he told Misty that Dorian was someone to bother then it must have been for a reason, right? Even if that reason is 'oh my god, my inmate continues to be up my butt, please let her be up your butt for a bit.'

(Note to self, tell Trixie how much you appreciate her and help out at breakfast again.) ]

You know what? Why not. Let's 'hang out' and 'have those drinks.' My place, I assume? After all, I doubt you have much alcohol at yours, what with being an inmate and all.

[ Dorian is not planning on actually telling Misty anything and is certainly not planning on talking about his feelings, as he's still in a bit of a funk due to the whole Elias thing. Dorian is planning on getting Misty so drunk she can't walk straight. ]

[citizendetective]

Also, I don't normally keep alcohol in my bedroom or bathroom... what's your cabin number?

[brushoff]

Level 6, room 12. Also, up your prison hooch game, Quigley.

[citizendetective]

Ugh, that sounds disgusting--

[She's on her way even as she speaks, knocking on the door just a minute or two later.]

Knock knock!

[brushoff]

Door's open! [ Dorian calls out. His door opens up to a small hallway. There's a locked attic hatch in the ceiling, a bathroom directly across from the door, a closed door to the right of Misty, and an open door to the left, leading into a kitchen and dining area. That's where Dorian is. ]

Get in here—I've already made us martinis.

[citizendetective]

Warden cabins are always so fancy.

[She comments, hearing him call from the kitchen but electing instead to wander off to the right, testing the handle of that closed door.]

Do you make your martinis dry or sweet?

[brushoff]

Dry. Gin, not vodka. But if you want something with vodka, I can make it later.

[citizendetective]

How much are you planning on drinking...?

[If the door doesn't open, she'll move on, and if it does, she'll poke her head in briefly and then move on; her main interest here is really only in seeing how big the cabin is. Either way, she'll pop into the kitchen momentarily.]

[brushoff]

[ The door indeed doesn't open. Sorry Misty, he's locked it! The bathroom, however, is unlocked! It's very plush with a claw-foot bathtub and a shitton of bath products sitting on the floor next to the tub. ]

Oh, I'm planning on getting shitfaced. After all, it's what Pagan and I would do. Surely you'll join me?

[citizendetective]

I'm kind of a lightweight, I'm usually more of a wine-drinker, but... we'll see! When I drink with you and Pagan--

[When. Not if.]

-- you're going to need a sober person in the room, right?

[brushoff]

Absolutely not! [ Dorian says, with a winning smile on his face. ] When we all get drunk together, we're all getting smashed.

[citizendetective]

[Despite herself, she smiles a little bit at that idea, adjusting her glasses on her face as she sits down.]

Well-- I can do that; I've done it before.

[Which she sounds excessively proud to admit to, despite the fact that it's a fairly basic life experience and she's forty goddamn years old.]

But I'm surprised to hear wardens encouraging this behavior in inmates! Shouldn't you be worried about me picking up bad habits?

[brushoff]

Didn't you hear? [ Dorian teases, as he slides the martini towards Misty. ] I'm a terrible influence. Comes with the territory and all.

[ And Dorian raises his glass as he takes a large drink of his martini. Somebody did not skimp on the alcohol. ]

[citizendetective]

What territory? Not wardening.

[She takes an experimental sip of hers, muttering to herself under her breath:]

Wow, this is strong.

[brushoff]

The territory of debauchery. After all, I am Dorian Gray—and all that it entails.

[citizendetective]

I did think that name was a little, uh, on the nose. I'm assuming it's an alias...?

[brushoff]

What? Oh, no, I'm actually that Dorian Gray. Portrait in the attic and everything.

[ Said attic that was definitely locked ]

[citizendetective]

[Wh...at. What. She glances down at the martini she's been plugging away at, as if it might be the cause of this insanity she's hearing.]

You're messing with me.

[brushoff]

Ohhh you are going to need a lot more alcohol, [ Dorian sighs, as he takes another drink of his martini. ]

Pick your poison next. Because no, I'm not messing with you.

[citizendetective]

I just-- different worlds, okay, but you're saying you're from a book.

Um, what else do you have?

[brushoff]

I'm not from a book. The book was written about me. A small difference, but a critical one—and yes, this means I've met Oscar Wilde.

As for alcohol, there's gin, vodka, whiskey, and a wide variety of mixers. No schnapps, though. I've got taste.