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[brushoff]

"You've reached the inbox of one Dorian Gray. Don't forget to leave me a message. If you're interesting, I'll get back to you."

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Comments

[brushoff]

Men like Pagan and myself are our own worst critics. I remain perpetually surprised I managed to graduate Trixie.

[citizendetective]

Oh, well, she was probably pretty easy, right?

[She takes a delicate sip of wine, and then tries for her first smile of the night. It's small and slight, but it's there, and it's real.]

[brushoff]

[ Dorian lets out a small chuckle as he takes a sip of his own wine. ]

Trixie was easy and annoyingly difficult at the same time. It's easy to pinpoint what's wrong with all the murderers and lunatics and come up with a game plan then and there. But how to you redeem someone who, by your account, didn't really do much wrong?

After all, Trixie's main problem was a crippling lack of self-esteem and a nasty tendency to pick fights.

[citizendetective]

The Barge does seem like a good place for someone with self-esteem issues.

[All that attention, all that validation from people like Iris...]

I don't get why it didn't pick me up when I was sixteen.

[brushoff]

Because you'd have to have died, [ Dorian bluntly responds. ]

Honestly? You should be thankful. Our squad of misfit teenagers...it's sad. Sad in both an emotional and pathetic sense. The wardens are sad because they have something they'd be willing to put their life on hold for at age sixteen, the inmates are sad because they've fucked up enough that they're on the ship in the first place.

[citizendetective]

It would have been easier - on Pagan, and on me. I'm forty-three, Dorian. I'm very set in my ways.

[brushoff]

I'm over a hundred and fifty. You're baby, Misty.

[citizendetective]

So are you, compared to people like Sweeney! That's not the point. I would have been thrilled to be here if I were still sixteen. I would have been happy to "change".

[She hooks fingerquotes into the air, then takes another gulp of wine.]

[brushoff]

I don't think so, [ Dorian says, with a shake of his head. ]

You'd like to think things would be different if teenage you were here. In practice? Who knows.

[citizendetective]

It's common sense, Dorian. If who I am is a "problem"--

[More fingerquotes.]

-- then the Admiral should have picked me up when the "problem" was still new.

[brushoff]

Right, I'm going to put a stop in that right there. [ He uses his free hand to point at Misty. ] You aren't a problem. Some choices you've made have been problems. But people don't magically turn into a different person when they graduate. They're still the same shitheads that arrived her, just a little more well-adjusted.

[citizendetective]

Dorian, I can't tell if you're being reassuring or defeatist here.

[brushoff]

What? I'm being reassuring! Couldn't you tell?

[citizendetective]

Talking about how change is impossible doesn't give a reassuring impression! Even to someone who doesn't really want to change.

[brushoff]

Change isn't impossible, I'm trying to say that you can still be a bit of a shitheel and still graduate!

[citizendetective]

[She sighs, forces some of the defensiveness out of her body language, and finishes off the rest of her first glass of wine.]

... Okay. Okay, thank you. I-- it's appreciated! Pagan says the same thing, and it means a lot.

[Reaching for the bottle she refills her glass, then holds it out as a silent offer to top off Dorian, too.]

Do you think I'm Nat's one and only?

[She says suddenly, out of the blue.]

Or are you imagining that as a one-way thing?

[brushoff]

I mean, you and Nat certainly aren't exclusive.

[ Because....well, someone might have eaten Natalie's pussy at the Halloween party BUT WE'RE NOT GONNA FOCUS ON THAT RIGHT NOW, HEY LET'S TOP OFF HIS WINE AS WELL, MORE DRINKS ARE GREAT ]

But I think there's a difference between 'being in love' and 'sleeping with someone.' Not to say that you two are in love, of course, [ except that they totally are ] but I think that if someone asked each of you 'who do you feel closest to, who is the one person that you would do anything for,' the two of you would answer with each other.

[citizendetective]

You really think she would? Has she said that?

[DO FUCKIN TELL, DORIAN]

[brushoff]

[ oh no ]

I mean, this is just an educated guess. You two are remarkably intense with each other.

[citizendetective]

[It's a guess that no one would ever have made at home. She can't imagine a single person from Wiskayok ever saying anything close to "she would do anything for you".

Which, of course, just makes this all the more interesting to hear.]

Okay, well-- obviously she told you that we're sleeping with each other.

[Misty, honey, you two were making out very publicly at the Halloween party.]

[brushoff]

Considering that I saw the two of you sucking face at the Halloween party, I'm not surprised.

[ guess who has eyes, bitch. ]

[citizendetective]

Well, we weren't then...

[But she's smiling - a little proud, a little smug.]

So she hasn't actually said anything. You're just, um, observing?

[brushoff]

I'm a horrific gossip, Misty. Of course I was observing.

[citizendetective]

Well! I appreciate your observations a lot more than people appreciate mine.

[brushoff]

Honestly, I think that's because you need to work on your phrasing. You can get away with being a terrible gossip if you just give it the right spin.