I've got money if needed, [ he shrugs. ] It'll just have to come out of the clothes found. But help us out, valiant Archivist. Let's get this piece of junk back to dry land.
[ Jon will get to doing most of the ropes, tying things off and setting up a loop for Dorian to affix to the right spot so all he needs do is tug on it to tighten it around the right spot. ]
We're going over maritime safety once we get back to what passes for dry land. You live on a barge, for Christ's sake!
One, space Barge, doesn't count. Two, I know how to work a yacht, I'm not hopeless. Three, we're still going on that shopping outing, Henry, you can't get out of that.
[ though as they work, Dorian is very helpful. He does know a bit about how ships work... but he's also a damn moron. ]
One, you didn't check the amount of petrol before you went out so yes, you're hopeless. [ To Dorian ] And two, he doesn't like to waste time with anyone, Henry, you're about as likely to pry him off with the jaws of life as that sort of logic.
[ He tugs the rope to make sure it's secure before- ]
All right, that should do. Let's get you both to land.
[ And he's starting the engine to get them going. ]
You're never getting rid of me! [ Dorian points out, in a sing-song voice. But it's about time to set off. Dorian gives Jon a nod then sits back, trying to not be in the way unless needed. ]
[Henry has no idea what the jaws of life are, but the comparison stands well enough on his own.
Basically, he's fucked.
He can't really do much to help, but he does lean against the back of the boat so there's no chance of getting thrown out. And at least he manages to stay awake until they're back to the docks, and he pushes himself up, not too proud to use Dorian as a crutch.]
[ Jon will handle all boat-related shenanigans, including getting the boat into it's slot at the dock and he'll even hop onto the dock to see it secured. He trusts Dorian to take care of Henry. He's also still rather annoyed at both of them.]
-and the next time both of you decide to leave your communicators at home when you're going out on a voyage, I'm asking for your most embarrassing memory and posting it to the network myself! Honestly.
[ There is no mistaking this for an actual real threat; he's just angry because he was worried for them both. But he sounds very fussed. ]
[ He pauses then and realizes that while Dorian is perfectly aware of what he's doing, Henry almost certainly isn't. Which is why he quietly explains- ]
I realize that, Henry. This is just... how I express my concerns: trying to bother you into being more careful because people have failed to come back after a port and no one knows what happens to those who leave the boat without graduating and in fact it's possible they go into the Void and disappear forever so...
[ He swallows and spreads his hands. ]
You don't have to defend yourself, I don't- I don't actually think either of you are inept. I was just concerned.
Our dear Jon is what we call a worrywart, [ Dorian points out. He's still trying to keep the tone light, still trying to seem nonchalant about the matter...though he does dial the smartass down for a moment or two. He'll turn his face towards Jon as he points out, ]
He doesn't need to worry, though. Jon knows me. I wouldn't let you get left behind.
[The explanation is appreciated. He's so unused to this sort of companionship and friendship. Seeing the two of them interact is like listening to some radio play. It doesn't seem real that two people talk to each other like this.]
It's not a comment on your competence, Henry, it's just... caring what happens to you, that's all.
[ He glances over at Dorian. ]
I know you wouldn't, Dorian, [ because he has never really bought Dorian's 'I don't care' act since the first statement he took, he could feel how much of a lie it was. ] which is why the two of you would be literally out to sea together.
[ Jon's eyes flicker to that walking beat... and he does his best to settle himself and not think about it too hard. It's the kind of thing he needs to keep a watch over but paranoia won't help anything. ]
It's easier for me to see you than not. Most of the time, my efforts are at keeping my eyes closed.
[ A small huff. ]
For all my... displeasure, it was a good idea. And you shouldn't hesitate if you're in a bad situation in the future and your communicator is out of reach.
The Ceaseless Watcher does literally see all, [ Dorian muses. ] And also apparently knows how to pilot a boat? Can I steal you for assistance when Henry and I borrow a yacht at some point?
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[ Just as simply as if he was agreeing that the sky is blue and water is wet. ]
I've brought supplies for the tow. I wouldn't want you to have to pay for the boat if we can help it.
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Use the clothes fund.
[He's still going to do his best to get out of that.]
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[ Jon will get to doing most of the ropes, tying things off and setting up a loop for Dorian to affix to the right spot so all he needs do is tug on it to tighten it around the right spot. ]
We're going over maritime safety once we get back to what passes for dry land. You live on a barge, for Christ's sake!
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[ though as they work, Dorian is very helpful. He does know a bit about how ships work... but he's also a damn moron. ]
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And strangely, he can't get the music out of his head.]
You're only my warden for a month. There is no reason to push this much.
[He looks to Jon, almost pleading for intervention.]
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[ He tugs the rope to make sure it's secure before- ]
All right, that should do. Let's get you both to land.
[ And he's starting the engine to get them going. ]
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Basically, he's fucked.
He can't really do much to help, but he does lean against the back of the boat so there's no chance of getting thrown out. And at least he manages to stay awake until they're back to the docks, and he pushes himself up, not too proud to use Dorian as a crutch.]
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-and the next time both of you decide to leave your communicators at home when you're going out on a voyage, I'm asking for your most embarrassing memory and posting it to the network myself! Honestly.
[ There is no mistaking this for an actual real threat; he's just angry because he was worried for them both. But he sounds very fussed. ]
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That's not a threat for me.
[ It's a little bit of a threat! But Dorian doesn't want to actually say what the threat is. He's fine! He's cool! Don't bother him! ]
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[Is that a challenge? Almost. Is he being defiant for the sake of being defiant? Absolutely.
Back on dry land, he leans heavily against Dorian, though managing to keep his feet underneath him.]
We would have been rescued either way. The Admiral wouldn't simply leave a prisoner behind.
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Oh, do not challenge me, the both of you.
[ He shakes his head, though, and he'll take up a spot on the other side of Henry. ]
Yes, and more than likely, you'd have had to face a death toll for it. Which is more trouble than it's worth.
Let's get you both back to the Barge and you can tell me all about how clever and not at all stupid this whole thing was.
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I will happily chat about how clever I am—and how I would never die in the first place. Shall we?
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It wasn't meant to be clever or stupid. This wasn't an sort of grand scheme.
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I realize that, Henry. This is just... how I express my concerns: trying to bother you into being more careful because people have failed to come back after a port and no one knows what happens to those who leave the boat without graduating and in fact it's possible they go into the Void and disappear forever so...
[ He swallows and spreads his hands. ]
You don't have to defend yourself, I don't- I don't actually think either of you are inept. I was just concerned.
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He doesn't need to worry, though. Jon knows me. I wouldn't let you get left behind.
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Oh.
I don't - need anyone to take care of me.
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[ He glances over at Dorian. ]
I know you wouldn't, Dorian, [ because he has never really bought Dorian's 'I don't care' act since the first statement he took, he could feel how much of a lie it was. ] which is why the two of you would be literally out to sea together.
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[ No comment on that 'I don't need anyone to take care of me' because in Dorian's mind, that's bull. ]
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Caring what happens to him. It's an odd concept. He doesn't quite believe it.]
It was the only other option we had. I thought it would be easy enough, if you could see me.
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It's easier for me to see you than not. Most of the time, my efforts are at keeping my eyes closed.
[ A small huff. ]
For all my... displeasure, it was a good idea. And you shouldn't hesitate if you're in a bad situation in the future and your communicator is out of reach.
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Not together.
[Can't they see that all he wants to fo is go back to his room with his spiders and read?
Is that too much to ask?]
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I was born and raised in Bournemouth, Dorian. The Ceaseless Watcher had much less to do with it than several part time jobs.
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cw suicidal ideation mention
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